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Originally Published on Storybilder February 4, 2021

Which of your characters is going to lie to your audience, and why?

Firstly, it’s always important to remember that no baddie ever actually thinks they’re the baddie. They are always hero of their own tales, so create them to believe that. Take Loki, from the Marvel Cinematic Universe films. His character arc is a great example of someone going to increasingly more desperate ends to prove himself and be accepted, and at no point does Loki consider himself the Villain—he is the ignored and bullied little brother, the victim of gaslighting and lies, the wronged rightful heir, the trapped and enslaved minion of Thanos, the desperately hurt and angry child trying to come back to a home that no longer values what he thought it did. We only see Loki as the villain the MCU because the point-of-view (POV) of the films tell us he is.

Why use an Unreliable Narrator?

For one thing, it’s juicy. While it’s hard to pull off right, when it works, it really, really works.

Whether this unreliability is pays off through your readers’ slow, dawning realization that something is off (Fight Club), or a grand reveal at the end of the story (The Sixth Sense), or even a revelation that changes the context of a truth told at the start of the story when nobody took it seriously (American Psycho), there is something satisfying about a really good Unreliable Narrator.

So how do you do it?

Deliberately feeding your readers misinformation, filtered through the POV of your narrator, is the best way to create a believable Unreliable Narrator.

• Remembering our lesson about your narrator knowing only what they know, you can add another layer to their internal voice: a filter the character uses to decide what they want to hold back from the reader.
• Your narrator should also be unreliable from the very start—your reader may not twig to it right away, and that’s fine, but they have to be consistently unreliable.
• Try to find ways to use the reactions and emotions of other characters to reflect this unreliableness, to help the reader figure it out on their own without explanations.
• Except, of course, when they’re really not reliable. Dropping small hints and little moments (for example, where a boast or a lie by the narrator is one step too far) will not only help the reader reassess what is and isn’t real, but also gives the reader some of that information they need to figure out that the narrator is not to be trusted.

However…

The one thing you cannot do to you reader is lie to them.

You can trick them, sure, by having the narrator lie (or at least, omit the truth). But you, the writer, you cannot lie to the reader. You cannot betray their trust in you as a storyteller with a cheap, thin, weak twist ending that you didn’t work to earn all the way through the book. Whatever groundwork you lay for your Unreliable Narrator, it has to be solid. (Imagine if you went back through The Sixth Sense and saw the ghost move a chair!)

In summary

Writing an Unreliable Narrator is really not much different than writing a reliable one. But it can make for a much more powerful reading experience. The only difference is that you had to add a second filter onto the mechanism/character you’re transporting the story through. The first filter is the character’s hegemonic (their primary or mainly visible) context, as discussed in the first post in this series, Who Is Telling Your Story, and the second is a layer of lies the character understands and relates to the reader, whether consciously, unconsciously, by circumstance, or by omission.

Originally Published on Storybuildr April 6, 2022

There are many ways to approach manuscript editing, each with its own particular process, and nearly every editor and writing advice site has their or its own method.  This post will describe the most common types, explain what they’re for, and provide questions you can ask yourself to ensure that you’re approaching this stage in the best way possible.

Bear in mind that this is my preferred order to do these kinds of editing, but feel free to do whatever works for you.

Content / Substantive

Pretend you don’t know the story at all.

Usually the first pass done on a manuscript is to ensure that the whole story works as a story.

Ask yourself:

• “Does it have a middle, beginning and end?”
• “Does it have stakes, and are they believable? Are the readers invested in them?”
• “Do my character arcs make sense?”
• “Did I tell the story I thought I was telling?”
• “Are there any plot holes, or dangling narrative strings left untied?”
• “Do my subplots support and help further the main narrative?”
• “Is the pacing lagging?”
• “Is my worldbuilding thorough enough? Does it make sense? Is there too much of it?”
• “Do my people react and behave in a believable way for their character?”

Answering these questions, and perhaps letting a beta reader or two read the manuscript, will likely lead into a round (or two, or seven) of revisions. Don’t be upset if you need to chuck subplots, rewrite entire chapters, merge characters, or any other number of things to firm up the novel. This is totally normal. (I’ve rewritten the ending of one of my novels so many times that I literally don’t remember which one is the one in the published version of the book.)

Writing is like archeology—you can only uncover the bones if you dig. And sometimes you think you’ve found a T-Rex when really it’s a Woolly Mammoth. Further investigation and careful consideration are always your friend.

Copy

Pretend you’re a High School English Teacher

Now that you know the story is solid, ask yourself if the words you are using to tell the story are the right ones.

• “Does the vocabulary/metaphors/idioms I’ve chosen furnish the tone/mood I’m aiming for? Or does it fracture?”
• “Is this too wordy or bloated? Have I over-described things? Under-described things?”
• “Why are the curtains blue?” (i.e. “Does my imagery/setting serve my story?”)
• “Do the phrases and paragraphs flow naturally from one to another, or is there idea-skipping or head-hopping going on?”

Think about the tone you’re trying to convey, and make sure the prose uplifts and supports your story.

Scansion and Wordcrafting

Pretend you’re a Theatre Kid

At this point, we’re starting to get into the nitty-gritty of things, like the individual choice of words and how they’re strung together.

• “Does that word mean what I think it means?”
• “Does the dialogue flow naturally? Do my characters speak the way actual people speak?”
• “Are my characters repeating things or explaining things that they don’t need to? (“As you know”, “I doesn’t have to be said, but,”, “I’ve already explained”)
• “Am I over-using the same phrases or imagery?”
• “Do the sentences flow naturally from one to another, or do they crash and crumple? If they crash, is it a deliberate style choice?”

One of the best exercises I know for making sure dialog sounds natural and your sentences flow smoothly is to actually read it out loud to yourself. Your ear will let you know when something is janky.

Proof

Pretend you’re the judgiest person on the planet.

This is your last chance to make sure that everything is legible and understandable on a word-by-word basis. I’m not saying it has to be boringly follow-the-rules correct, but be aware that anything that gets between your reader and the understanding of the prose is the perfect opportunity for them to DNF.

• “Am I breaking this grammar/punctuation rule for effect and to further tone/character, or is it wrong because I’m lazy/don’t know better?”
• “Is this word really spelled the way I think it is?”
• “Is there a red or blue squiggle under this word?”
• “Am I misusing a homonym?”
• “Is my attempt to write an accent unintentionally racist?”

You only get one chance to make a first impression, so make sure it’s a good one.

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Have a question about the craft or business of being a writer? Check out more WORDS FOR WRITERS articles or ask me a question and I’ll answer in a new article.

I know it’s been an age since I updated my Smashwords, but all of my selfpublished backlist titles are now available.

You can purchase eBook versions of my novels through my Smashwords Store at this link.

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We talk writing tips and tricks, writers block and burnout, fanfiction and Mary Sues, screenwriting and acting exercises, and much, much more!

• Listen to the Interview Here
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The Accidental Turn Series and The Skylark’s Saga are getting a refresh!

Can you believe it’s nearly ten years since the first book in The Accidental Turn series was published? Yeah, me either!

With 2024 just a few months away, I’ve been working with Ruthanne Reid (indie author and cover designer extraordinaire) to give both series a nice, new set of covers. The novels are currently unavailable to purchase, as they’re still getting their revamped interiors worked on, but you can read samples of each book for free on Wattpad.

THE ACCIDENTAL TURN SERIES

This book follows Pip, who is pulled against her will into the epic fantasy novel series she’s loved since she was a teenager. However, the world is darker, and far more dangerous than she could have ever predicted, especially when it turns out the hero is a much bigger misogynistic ass than she knew.  Pip knows how to circumnavigate the Hero’s Journey and the pitfalls and loopholes of this particular world – but what will happen to her beloved characters outside of the comfort of the fantasy they were written for? And what happens when it’s not the male-power-fantasy hero, but the hero’s overlooked and bullied little brother who proves to be her biggest champion?

THE SKYLARK’S SAGA

A Saskwyan flight mechanic with uncanny luck, seventeen-year-old Robin Arianhod grew up in the shadow of a decade-long war. But the skies are stalked by the Coyote—a ruthless Klonn pilot who picks off crippled airships and retreating soldiers. And as the only person to have survived an aerial dance with Saskwya’s greatest scourge, Robin has earned his attention.

As a Pilot, Robin is good. But the Coyote is better. When he shoots her down and takes her prisoner, Robin finds herself locked into a new kind of dance. The possibility of genuine affection from a man who should be her enemy has left her with a choice: accept the Coyote’s offer of freedom and romance in exchange for repairing a strange rocket pack that could spell Saskwya’s defeat, but become a traitor to her county. Or betray her own heart and escape. If she takes the rocket pack and flees, she could end the war from the inside.